How to {Require} a Favor {and obtain} It (5 easy rules + real examples)

Think {of all} favors {you may want}:

  • A job referral from {a vintage} boss
  • A friend {to instruct} you {how exactly to} cook {meals} to impress your girlfriend
  • An introduction to the founder of a startup {you would like to|you need to|you wish to} freelance for

Favors like these can {become} turning points {inside our} life. But sometimes it’s hard to {require} a favor – {particularly if} you’re shy {rather than} too confident {concerning the} process.

Today I’m {likely to} {educate you on} the five {easy steps} to {require} a favor {and also} get {what you need|what you would like}.

How to {require} a favor in 5 steps

  1. Consider how your favor impacts them
  2. Ask with the expectation {your} favor {will undoubtedly be} granted
  3. Don’t lie
  4. Hold {to} your power
  5. Be very specific {in what} you’re requesting

Each year on my birthday I ask my readers {to accomplish} me {a straightforward} favor: Comment telling me how IWT has personally helped them

You {know very well what} happens? I {have more} than 500 comments {each and every time|each time}. People LOVE telling me about landing their dream job, eliminating $45K of debt, earning $10K on the side, {and much more}.

This {is the greatest} gift {I possibly could} {expect}. I don’t need cookies or new clothes. {I simply} love hearing how my material has helped {other folks}.

This {is a} tiny favor. I’ve also asked for bigger ones like {obtaining a} {couple of} my entrepreneur friends to {donate to} an e-book I was {focusing on}.

So {how can you} {require} a favor {and obtain} great results?

Just use these 5 steps.

Let’s {begin}.

Want to finally {strat to get} paid what you’re worth? I {demonstrate} exactly how {in my own} {Back again to} Top

Step 1: Consider how your favor impacts them

When you {require} a favor, you’re essentially doing sales. You’re selling {another person} {your preferences} at {the expense of} their time, energy, and/or money.

And that’s what you’ve {surely got to} realize: It’s {not absolutely all} about you. While this favor benefits you {for some reason}, you’re putting this person out in another way. {You have to|You should} acknowledge that and compensate {for this}.

Having empathy {such as this} is absolutely {essential for} two reasons:

  1. It {enables you to} talk to {the individual} you’re selling to {on the} terms. {It is possible to} {relate with} them and speak their language. {Consider it}: {The method that you|The way you} {require} a favor {from your own} boss {will be a lot} different than {the method that you|the way you} {require} a favor {from your own} friend.
  2. It {enables you to} adapt as the sale happens. {Once you} care about {another} person’s emotions and needs, {you can observe|you can view} if what you’re asking {from their website} is {an excessive amount of}, {or possibly} if you’re asking it {in a manner that} makes them feel weird. So stop weirding them out and {relate with} them.

Check out {this phenomenal} email {I acquired} {from the} reader {some time} back that did exactly this.

{A good example of} {an excellent} request email


This email {may be the} perfect {exemplory case of} everything that {switches into} learning {how exactly to} {require} a favor:

  1. He showed that he actually knows me. {There is nothing} {likely to} make me {desire to} trash your email faster {when compared to a} boilerplate message. The guy who sent me this message showcased how he knew me and how I’ve helped him.
  2. He made me care. Most likely, {the individual} you’re {looking to get} a favor from is busy. That’s {for you to} make them {provide a} damn. That incentivized me {a lot more} {to utilize} him. He also touched on {a topic} that matters {if you ask me} ({in this instance|in cases like this}, the sender knew that I’m always {searching for} talented developers).
  3. He {managed to get} {an easy task to} say yes. The reader who sent me {the e-mail} {managed to get} clear that, though he {wanted} paid work, {he’d} be {ready to} work “to network and {get a} little advice” while acknowledging that {I did so} have {several} projects that I didn’t have time for.

By {enough time} I finished {the e-mail}, I was clamoring for {the telephone} to call him. THAT’S {the method that you|the way you} {require} a favor.

Want to finally {strat to get} paid what you’re worth? I {demonstrate} exactly how {in my own} {Back again to} Top

Step 2: Ask with the expectation {your} request {will undoubtedly be} granted

However, {in the event that you feel} like you’re putting them out by {requesting} this favor, stop. You’ve already failed.

Your mental framework matters. {You have to|You should} believe you’re {likely to} get {anything you} {require}. If you’re {likely to} play, play to win. Don’t try. Don’t hope. You’ve already {made a decision to} {take action} … {you may} as well {still do it}.

You play to win meme

Go in with a winner’s mentality.

You {is going} in ACKNOWLEDGING {that you will be|you are} asking them to {walk out} their way. But that doesn’t mean you go in thinking that you’re “bothering” them or {that} {is really a} waste {of these} time.

That’s why {I wish to|I would like to} {review} the “{Imagine if} I were perfect” technique.

I’ve talked {concerning this} technique before but it’s {vital that you} mention again {since it} has everything {related to} confidence.

Let’s say that {you’re} trying to {are more} confident about {presenting and public speaking}, or cooking, or running, or starting {a small business}. Whatever.

With these goals come {a couple of} crippling barriers:

  • What {easily} screw up and {create a} bad meal?
  • What {easily} never {shed weight}?
  • What if my business fails?

And {often}, that’s enough to screw up. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.

That’s what happened when I was younger and I thought nobody would ever {arrive} to {my own} finance class – and nobody did. That’s because I already set myself up for failure with my mental barriers.

Instead, just {consider}, “{Imagine if} I were the absolute master {of the} domain? {Imagine if} I were perfect and had {all of the} knowledge – {on the planet|on earth} – what would {I really do}?”

You wouldn’t get overwhelmed {by visiting} the store, buying onions, and learning {how exactly to} chop them. You wouldn’t get overwhelmed {by visiting} {the fitness center} and hitting the treadmill. I definitely wouldn’t {have already been} bothered by getting {visitors to} attend {my own} finance class.

And you wouldn’t get psyched out by asking someone for a favor.

You would just do {that which was} {essential to} accomplish {your targets}. This technique {can help you} get past {your personal} mental barriers and say, “{EASILY} were perfect, how would I handle {this problem|this matter}?”

Using this exercise is {a terrific way to|the best way to} {are more} confident {as time passes}.

For more help, {have a look at} my video below {on how best to} develop natural confidence. It’s only six minutes but you’ll learn {some very nice} mental frameworks.

Want to finally {strat to get} paid what you’re worth? I {demonstrate} exactly how {in my own} {WORKING AT HOME}: {THE FUNDAMENTAL} Beginner’s Guide.

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Step 3: Don’t lie

Many people {believe that|believe} {you need to} lie or {at the very least} tell a white lie (like these 7 money lies) {with regards to} {requesting} something. They believe you’ll {become more} successful {in the event that you} butter someone up {and present} them {a lot of} phony reasons {to accomplish} something.


Being truthful is {why is} people believe you and {desire to} help you. {Studies also show} {that whenever} you come at {folks from} {a location} of honesty you {not merely} make yourself {as well as your} relationship with {see your face} happier but it’s also better {for the} mental health (per UC San Diego’s Emotion Lab).

Think {about any of it}. {EASILY} want my brother-in-law to introduce me to his boss, he’s {likely to} be pissed {easily} {arrived at} him with the pretense of asking how his Thai cooking classes {‘re going}.

“Hey I saw that pad thai you made on Instagram {last week}. Awesome stuff. {Do you consider} your boss likes pad thai too?”

Fail. Instead he’ll respect me {easily} am direct and {simply tell him}, “Hey, {I must say i} want an intro to your boss because {I believe} {I possibly could} help him with XYZ goal.”

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Step 4: Leverage your power

Nobody likes a needy person. But {in the event that you} {become} you don’t {actually need} your favor granted, you’re {more prone to} get {what you need|what you would like}.

I‘ve explained this before in the context of negotiating {the right path} out of paying bank fees. Banks want {your cash} however they {will get} it, but {in the event that you} threaten to leave {the lender} they’ll clear any charges {very quickly}.

I’m not saying threaten to terminate a friendship or partnership because they’re not presenting {what you need|what you would like} on a gold platter.

Instead, lead {in to the} conversation with something organic. {For instance}, “Hey, {can you} still want those tickets for {the overall game} on Thursday? I’m {pleased to} {present them} {since i have} know {you like} the team – but I was hoping {I possibly could} ask you for a favor. {Can you} have {a few hours} {to greatly help} me move this weekend?”

It’s like my system for {requesting} a raise {from your own} boss or raising your freelance rates {for the} clients: Always {take action} after you’ve added value.

Did {you merely} crush a project {at the job} that {more sales} by 100%? Perfect {time and energy to} {require} that raise.

Did you create {a contact} {for the} client that doubled leads for them? Strike {as the} iron is hot and {increase your} rates.

This isn’t all {to state} {that you need to|that you ought to} be doing favors for {other folks} strictly {so that you can} have a bargaining chip for {if you want} a favor. What I’m saying {can be your} {likelihood of} having your favor granted increase immensely when you’ve done something nice for {your partner}.

Think about my birthday example. It doesn’t actually matter {for you} that it’s my birthday. But, {due to} how our society {is established}, you feel {as if you} owe me one {due to the} value I’ve provided you. It’s totally okay to leverage situations {like this}.

Want to finally {strat to get} paid what you’re worth? I {demonstrate} exactly how {in my own} {Back again to} Top

Step 5: Be very specific {in what} you want

When you {require} directions, {can you} {rise} to someone and say, “{How do you} go somewhere?”

Of course not. {Not merely} would you {appear to be} an idiot, {nevertheless, you} wouldn’t get {what you need|what you would like}. Instead you ask specifically, “{How do you} {reach} the Farmhouse Restaurant?”

The same goes {once you} {require} your favor. {Be sure you} {employ a} specific ask {at heart}.

Don’t ask: “{Is it possible to} get me {employment}?”

Ask: “{Is it possible to} give me a warm intro to Ross Currier? He’s {your mind} of accounting at Company XYZ, and there’s {a posture} {checking} under him that I’m {thinking about}.”

Don’t ask: “{Are you currently} {for this} weekend?”

Ask: “{Are you currently} free on Saturday afternoon? {I have to} {grab} a couch from ABC Store and I was wondering {in the event that you} could drive me over in your pickup {to obtain} it.”

Be direct. Be succinct. {Once you} say {just what} {you need}, people know {just how} {to assist you}.

A great {exemplory case of} {this is} when I asked {some of} my entrepreneur friends to {donate to} an e-book I was writing.

I knew {that} {these folks} were incredibly busy, {therefore i} {had a need to} offer value {in their mind} and {suggest to them} that the favor wasn’t a waste {of their own time}.

Here’s {an exclusive} email I wrote to NYT bestselling author Ben Casnocha when {I needed} him {to greatly help} me with my 15 Little Life Experiments e-book. My comments {come in} brackets:

Hey Ben,

I’m {piecing together} {a brief} free e-book with fascinating/actionable {test outcomes} (e.g., material on marketing, business, lifestyle design, social dynamics, career hacks, etc). [Quickly introduce what I’m doing {and obtain} them {worked up about} it. Note how I skip over introductions because I {know} Ben. {EASILY} didn’t, {it might be|it will be|it could be} {vital that you} introduce who {I’m} {and just why} he should read this email.]

I’d {want to} {perhaps you have} contribute, and {wished to} see if you’d be interested. I {curently have} {a good idea} of what your test result {could possibly be}. [VIPs expect {one to} want something {from their website}. Get to {the idea}. Again, {this is simply not} the approach {I’d} take with everyone, {nonetheless it} works here because Ben is (1) insanely busy and (2) {a pal}.]

I’ll be putting IWT’s marketing muscle behind it – we’ll be sharing it {with this} {set of} 200,000+ and we {have a much} {at the very least} 500,000 other emails {venturing out}. The emails {could have} links {to your website|to your internet site}. [Benefit. Why should he care? {Remember that} almost anyone {would like to} get this {sort of} exposure. (And note the meta-lesson of me promoting Ben in this very email.)]

All {I’d} need from you is ONE great test/result that you’ve run. {For instance}, {among the} following list:

1. How I started {getting up} earlier (lifestyle)

2. One phrase {I usually} use when I meet someone new (social dynamics)

3. How {I acquired} more people {to become listed on} my email list (business/marketing) [Anticipate {the requirements} of the reader. As he reads, he’s saying, “Hmm…so what would this require?” BOOM – proactively hit him with specific examples.]

({For you personally}, I’m {considering} conversational techniques you used to {are more} interested/interesting … or {the method that you|the way you} elicit {visitors to} {are more} open {when you are} transparent yourself. Also, {you’d} that AWESOME tip about speaking, where you {have a} mid-talk break and {inform them} 5 books {to jot down}, and everyone wakes up. People love that.) [Personalize it. I personalized every email I sent and got {a significant} response rate of over 90%. Use my motto – “Don’t make the busy person do {your projects} {for you personally}” – and suggest {suggestions to} them. There’s more {to the} principle that I outline {in my own} e-book on writing winning emails (see below).]

We’ll include ~300-word {research study} {in regards to a} successful test you’ve run. Here’s a previous e-book we did with examples from people like BJ Fogg, Mark Sisson, and Josh Kaufman: [Include a finished result, {when possible}. {This} shows him big names I {caused} {previously|during the past}, so {he is able to} see {this is} a gathering of renowned contributors.]


Our deadline is Wednesday, September 18th. What {do you consider}?


P.S. If you’re interested {however, not} sure what you’d contribute, {i want to} know and {I could} {offer you a} quick call {to talk about} {ideas}. [VIPs get swamped with emails. Sometimes, {I favor} to {visit} a 5-minute call while I’m {among} errands. {THEREFORE I} offer that option here.]

A few takeaways:

  • Be specific but brief. VIPs are busy {and don’t|, nor} {desire to} read your tortured expository essay {on your own} life history, food allergies, and the mole {on your own} back
  • Focus on what’s {inside it} for THEM. Benefit-driven, {centered on} benefit {in their mind} (“putting {the entire} IWT muscle behind it”)
  • Offer {an obvious} CTA ({proactive approach}). You wouldn’t believe {just how many} people end their emails {if you ask me} with “Yeah, so … wow, I wrote {a lot more than} I thought” DELETE
  • Anticipate every objection and {countermand it} before {they are able to} consciously voice it. Who’s {likely to} {maintain} this? Oh, {listed below are} past people I {caused}. I don’t have any ideas. Oh, let’s {can get on} a call and I’ll {assist you to} {develop} some, etc.

Get {everything you} want

I’ve just given you the five steps to {requesting} a favor and getting {what you need|what you would like}. {This plan} works for anything.

And {if you would like} specific scripts for emails that get results too, {I’ve} five {you may use} to:

  1. Set up an informational interview
  2. Ask for {tips for} {visitors to} talk to
  3. Cold email a stranger for advice
  4. Pitch for a consulting gig {or perhaps a} job interview
  5. Reach out to others in {your organization} {to access} know them

Just enter {your details} below, and I’ll send you these five word-for-word scripts {free of charge}.

Yes, send me the FREE scripts!

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