If you’re {finding out about} how much {one to} {devote to} an {gemstone}, you’re probably {sick and tired of} {yet} ol’ crappy posts about {marriage rings}.
(Yes, {I understand} {marriage rings} and engagement rings {will vary}) .
Yes, {we realize} the diamond industry wants us {to invest} more. Yes, synthetic diamonds are flooding {the marketplace}, and yes, I saw “Blood Diamond” with Leonardo DiCaprio. {We realize} about your aunt’s cousin’s brother who got a ring for $2.59 and they’ve been happily married for 80 years.
That’s great.
But when I {made a decision to} propose to my girlfriend, I started doing research – and {I came across} myself getting increasingly frustrated. I had real questions.
What {kind of} ring {must i} get? Do the “4 Cs” really matter? Is this jeweler {likely to} rip me off? Do {I must say i} {have to} save two months’ salary?
I did {an instant} Google search and I felt myself getting {a lot more} frustrated. The {suggestions about} other sites {explained} to “do my research,” “{learn} her ring size,” and “pick my budget.”
Uh … I {KNOW} THAT! {Nobody|No-one} addressed {the true} questions I had.
So, {I did so} {my very own} research {and today} I’m {likely to} show you {just what} I {finished up} doing, including:
This {may be the} stuff you won’t find in other {gemstone} posts.
How much {to invest} on an {gemstone}: First things first
Hi, {i am} Ramit Sethi. I’m {the writer} of a New York Times best-selling book on personal finance. Don’t worry, I’m not {likely to} {make one feel} bad about {attempting to} buy an {gemstone} ({as well as} spending {a whole lot} {onto it}). I don’t have any secret backroom {handles} diamond dealers. {I simply} want to {demonstrate} what nobody else is {discussing} {with regards to} buying an {gemstone}.
I spent {plenty of} time {studying} the diamond industry and {finished up} {investing in a} ring that my girlfriend Cass – now wife – loved.

Here’s what I knew {entering} {the procedure}: I’d met {a female} I loved and I knew {an} {gemstone} was {vital that you} her. She never mentioned size or cost, but I knew she wanted {a good} ring {that has been} ethically sourced.
This is {my own} experience {locating the} perfect ring {on her behalf} with some additional insights from you guys, my readers.
So here we go…
NOTE: {Need to know|Wish to know} the #1 {reason behind} divorce? Money! Before you pop the question, {be sure you} have {finances} {to be able}. My FREE pure marketing nonsense. Look at {your personal} financial situation {to choose} {everything you} can comfortably afford. I asked {a lot more than} 1,500 of my readers, and {based on} income, people typically spent between 4% and 8% {of these} yearly income.


Two months’ salary is 16%, {incidentally}. Click to enlarge.
So I started with {obtaining a} general price down. {It may be} “$1,000 to $3,000” (with room to stretch to $3,500), or {it may be} “around $10,000” {as well as} “$40,000 to $60,000.” Whatever {it really is}, know it and remember it.


This data isn’t scientific. But with over 1,500 results, {it offers} you {an over-all} sense of {just how much} people spend. Personally, these numbers seem low for what {I understand} my friends in NYC spent. But {this is actually the} full dataset {regardless of} geography. Click to enlarge.


If you’re {having difficulty} {buying} a budget, find {your earnings} bracket here for {an over-all} benchmark. Click to enlarge.
A general number helps {since when} you {head into} a store, you’re {not just a} mark – you’re {in charge}. You wouldn’t ask {an automobile} salesman {what type of|what sort of} car {you should purchase}. You’d {research your options} first! Do {a similar thing} for your {gemstone}.
Bonus: Having {several} {blast of} income {will help you} through tough economic times. {Learn to|Figure out how to|Discover ways to} start {making profits} {privately} with my FREE Click to enlarge.
Think {about any of it} – {given that} I knew the {overall look} mattered most, {I possibly could} focus my {look at different companies} {the appearance} of the diamond. {I possibly could} instantly discard {the majority of the} nonsense {round the} “perfect” diamond.
This {can be an} area {where one can} “capture value,” or {cut costs|spend less}, {because you} don’t {have to} weigh it in your consideration.
So {just forget about} micro-blemishes, the stories you hear {concerning the} diamond heritage, and resale value. {It is a} gift, {no} investment. {Concentrate on} {both} key drivers {that folks} want – size and bling – {and obtain} the ring that you {as well as your} partner discussed.
In other words:
- Use your eyes {to guage} a diamond {your lover} {will like}. Don’t {allow} 4 Cs lead you astray
- In my experience, size and bling (“sparkle”) matter most. Be smart. Don’t {purchase a} big diamond {which has} no bling. It’s {vital that you} balance the two
- Above all, {make sure to} know what {your lover} wants and loves! Don’t let your preconceived notions (or worse, society’s) guide {your choice}. This gift {is approximately} your partner
By now, {you understand} your budget, {the kind of} ring and band, {and you also} know {to spotlight} size and bling. {Time and energy to} {obtain the} ring.
Thousands {of individuals} {each year} get married {with no} {a company} grasp {on the} personal finances beforehand. Don’t be {one of these}! {Have a look at} my FREE David S. Diamonds
Along {just how}, I was also cross-referencing my friends’ recommendations with Yelp {along with other} online reviews. {Websites on the internet} are helpful {in the event that you} don’t have firsthand recommendations {in your area}, {however in} my experience, {the majority of the} jewelry industry isn’t really online-savvy yet.
Now I planned my visits. {Within an} ideal world, {you need to} start {this technique} {6 to 8} weeks before you propose {because it} takes time {to get the} ring. I was {owning a} little late (Cass had {explained} she {wished to} be engaged in “Q1” – yes, I knew she was {the lady} of my dreams when she used financial quarters {to speak about} engagements), {therefore i} had to accelerate things by getting efficient.
Remember, 80% of {the task} {is performed} before {you obtain} there. I scheduled three visits {on a single} day. 60 minutes each, 15-minute break {among}. Before I visited, I emailed {in advance} (like {you’ll} {an automobile} dealer) and told them {just what} I {wanted} – {the form} of the diamond, my budget, etc. – and asked them {to truly have a} few samples ready for when I went in. {The e-mail} from Cass above made {anywhere near this much} easier.
Scheduling the visit
Hi George,
My name is Ramit. I’m {thinking about} proposing to my girlfriend around X/X/XXXX and I’m beginning {the procedure} {of shopping for} a ring.
A friend of mine, NAME, recommended I {can be found in} and see you. I’m {searching for} an oval ring.
I’m free on Wednesday at 1pm or 3pm. Can we schedule {one hour} for me {to go to}?
Thanks,
Ramit
Jeweler response
Ramit, {this is a} pleasure {to meet up} you. Wednesday at 1pm {will continue to work} fine. {Is it possible to} tell me more {concerning the} ring {you are searching for}?
George
Sending prep notes {before} time
Great, {looking towards} meeting! I’m including {a contact} below from my girlfriend on the {forms of} rings she likes. {I’d} {want to} see {types of} rings {such as this} (and {other things} you recommend) on Wednesday.
Ramit
(If this feels weird or demanding, remember: {It is a} huge purchase {for you personally} {plus they} want {your organization}. They’ll {look after|care for} {one to} make the sale. Play {from the} position of strength!)
ACTION STEP: Eight weeks before you propose, compile {a listing of} {3 to 5} jewelers {you can travel to} and {reserve} some time {through the} week {to go to} them. {Intend to} spend {at the very least} {one hour} at {each one of these} {to check} over rings.
Step 2: {Go to the} jewelers
It was funny. When I was {a youngster}, I read “Goldilocks and the Three Bears,” (“too hot … too cold … {perfectly}”) but I never thought I’d be living it … while {searching for} an {GEMSTONE}.
It {proved} {that certain} jeweler was {at the top} floor of a building in a super-luxe office. He {presented} drinks, the lighting was stunning, and the diamonds were incredible – and expensive. Another jeweler was on a mid-level floor behind two security doors in a plainly furnished office. A third was {on the floor} floor, flooded with people, and {he previously} {the entire} cheapest prices.
Even though I didn’t {arrange for} this, {it had been} great. I learned that the glamour of {any office} has {nothing in connection with} {choosing the best} ring. Don’t {purchase} your jeweler’s expensive rent – just {concentrate on} {locating the} ring! Also, broaden your horizons! Don’t just {head to} cheap jewelers or expensive ones. {Get yourself a} feel {for several} price points. {You may be|You could be} surprised {with what} {you discover}.
Visit 1: {Once you} mention your plans {to some} trusted friends, {you will probably find} {one individual} who HAPPILY volunteers {to greatly help}. Take them {through to} it. {It’s likely that}, they love helping people {look for} engagement rings and they’ve done it multiple times.
Even {with the|with all the current} preparation, I was {not used to} this entire game. {THEREFORE I} asked {among} my friends’ wives {ahead}.
This was awesome because she knew my girlfriend, she knew jewelry, and she had helped other guys {making use of their} ring purchase. Perfect – {I acquired} {the opportunity to} get walked through {the procedure} by someone I trusted.
Here’s what she {explained} before we walked in:
- “I’ve taken {many individuals} {to get} their rings here”
- “He’s {likely to} {make an effort to} wow you with stories {concerning the} heritage of the diamonds. Just ignore it. Cass wants an oval diamond from the pics she sent. {Concentrate on} {discovering that}”
- “He’s {likely to} {demonstrate} different rings {which are} cheaper {and much more} expensive. {Some individuals} walk in and throw their budget out the window. Don’t feel pressured {to create a|to produce a} decision today. Just learn and compare these rings with {another} jewelers you see”
SUPER VALUABLE.
In this first visit (to the Glamorous Guy), the jeweler spent {lots of time|considerable time} educating me {concerning the} {various kinds of} rings, {where you can} “capture value” (or {cut costs|spend less} on {items that} don’t matter), and {how exactly to} {consider} diamond rings. {Needless to say} he was selling me! {This process} {is named} “consultative sales.” {Simply take} {all you} learn with a grain of salt.
Visit 2: I went alone. {I needed} {time and energy to} myself to {start to see the} diamonds {without any help}. This was {an instant} trip and I only {visited} {among the} jewelers.
Visit 3: I asked my sister and brother-in-law to come. {I needed} their perspective {given that they} knew Cass’s style, they knew my budget, and they’d {experienced} {the procedure} before. I took them to three jewelers who I’d narrowed my search {right down to}. I purchased the ring {with this} trip.
ACTION STEP: Invite {a couple of} married friends out to go ring shopping with you. Use our script to send {an ideal} email.
Step 3: Negotiate, negotiate, negotiate
During the purchase process, {among the} jewelers {explained} something I’ll {remember}.
It was {the 3rd} jeweler I’d visited, the guy {on the floor} floor. When I walked in and told him what {I needed}, he looked me in {the attention} and said, “OK, I’m {likely to} {demonstrate} how my business works,” and took out his phone. {Then} pulled up an app and said, “Tell me {just what} {you need} – size, color, whatever – and I’ll plug it in here. {I could} get any diamond {in the united kingdom} here.”
So I told him what {I needed}, and he pulled it {through to} the app. {Actually}, the craziest thing he did was pull up {the precise} diamond I had just seen two blocks away – a diamond that I was told was “{the merchandise} of Flemish diamond cutters” who “have passed {the data} down from generation to generation.”
He heard all that and said, “{I could} have that diamond here by tomorrow morning.” {Understand this}: His price for {the very same|the same} diamond was $2,000 less!
Why {let you know} this story? To reiterate {the truth that} diamonds {certainly are a} commodity. You can {and you will be} {in a position to} negotiate {a lesser} price on any stone {you need} {due to} that fact. {Overlook the} stories your jeweler {lets you know}. {Concentrate on} what it {appears like} and if {your lover} {should} it.






Also, {DON’T BE} MISLED BY {CONSIDERING} RESALE VALUE. Your diamond {is actually} worthless {when} you {go out} of the store. {Many individuals} think {they are able to} resell their diamond for {a fairly} good percentage of {the initial} price – {plus they are} all wrong. You can read {an in depth} account of {attempting to} resell a diamond here (amazing article), but {my own} {guideline} is {that should you} {ever really tried} to resell the diamond, {you need to} assume a 15% return. {Quite simply|Put simply|Basically}, {in case you have|for those who have|when you have|should you have} a $1,000 ring and {sell} it, {you can find} $150 – if you’re lucky.
In fact, once it’s clear you’re {going to} buy, {you need to be|you ought to be|you have to be} open about pricing: Don’t {make an effort to} beat {round the} bush or “hint” about negotiation. {Most probably}: {Require} the pricing chart.


Ask how they charge. They expect it, {and several} of the hungriest jewelers will just {demonstrate} their pricing and {ask you for} {a small %} over cost.
ACTION STEP: {Plan} your negotiations. For my {absolute best} negotiation tactics, {make sure to} {have a look at} my article on the 4 simple rules of negotiations.
Ramit’s big takeaways on buying an engagement ring
My overall insights on buying an {gemstone}:
- 80% of {the task} {is performed} before you set foot in a jewelry shop. {As you} of my friends said, “I didn’t {know very well what} I was doing, but I knew I was {carrying it out} wrong.” {The easiest method to|The simplest way to|The ultimate way to} combat {that is} to intentionally prepare by {creating a} few key decisions before you {head into} your first jewelry store. Specifically, {can get on} {exactly the same} page {together with your} partner, know {your present} spending range, see multiple jewelers, {make sure they are} work for {your organization}, and {understand that} a diamond {is a} small part – but {a significant} part – {of creating} a life together. {In the event that you} follow the steps {in this article}, you’ll be far {before} {everyone} else.
- The single-most important {section of the|area of the|portion of the} process is having an open discussion {together with your} partner. {Way too many} people think the {gemstone} {ought to be} a surprise. Wrong! Your proposal date {ought to be} a surprise. {The method that you|The way you} propose {ought to be} a surprise. {Nevertheless, you} should know {just what} {sort of} ring {your lover} wants. {Can get on} {exactly the same} page {concerning the} {design of} ring she wants. And clarify any questions {concerning the} budget using my scripts above.
- Know {a} ring {is really a} symbol for something greater. {Discussing} a ring {does mean} talking about {your own future} together – and that’s {where in fact the} real value {of the} process is apparent. Where do {you want to} live? Will both {folks} work? {Just how do} {you want to} raise kids? Do we even want kids? I {think about this} the “secret sauce” {of the} post: {It had been} {an easy task to} get fixated on the ring shopping, the proposal, and {taking into consideration the} budget. But those were ultimately details. What really mattered was us {developing a} new chapter of our lives together – and being open {about any of it} {with one another}.
How {to invest} {anything you} want on an engagement ring
The #1 question about engagement rings {is nearly} always about cost.
And as I’ve shown you, {I’ve} {another} view than {a lot of people}: {If you prefer a} $1,000 ring, great. {If you prefer a} $50,000 ring, also great. Again, {the true} meaning isn’t in the dollars {you may spend}, but in {the brand new} chapter {of one’s} relationship.
The {simplest way} {to cover} a ring {would be to} have followed the “automatic savings plan” {in my own} book. {Exactly like} I wrote there, I’d been saving for a ring {for approximately} {a decade} – even before I was in a relationship!


As the quote goes, “{The optimum time} to plant a tree was {twenty years} ago. {The next} best time {is currently}.”
If you’re {scanning this}, {it’s likely that} you’re {prepared to} pop the question, {therefore you} don’t have {a decade} {to save lots of} up for the ring. That’s fine. {I would recommend} my article on how {to create} money fast {for a few} ideas on long-lasting {methods to} {have significantly more} money {to place} toward your ring.
But if I’m catching you early, {I’ve} {an ideal} system {that you should|so that you can|that you can} start saving {for the} {gemstone}: Conscious Spending Plan.
This {may be the} {identical} system that {my pal} uses {to invest} $21,000 {venturing out} to bars and {having a great time} with friends. {This is actually the} {identical} system I used to automatically save for the ring, so cost wasn’t a primary issue.
This system – which I’ll {demonstrate} – {enables you to}:
- Automate your finances
- Know where {your cash} goes so you’re in complete control of the situation
If {you would like to|you need to|you wish to} learn more {on how best to} automate {finances}, {have a look at} this 12-minute video of me explaining {the precise} process {I take advantage of} below.
Being {in a position to} buy the {gemstone} you want {is} a small {section of} your journey to a Rich Life. That’s why {I wish to|I would like to} {give you} something my team and {I have already been} working on {to assist you} {enjoy better paychecks} to live {the life span} {you need}: {THE BEST} Guide to {EARNING MONEY}.
Download {a free of charge} copy of my Ultimate Guide {to understand} my best {approaches for} creating multiple income streams, starting {a small business}, and {upping your} income by {thousands} {per year}.
({Because of} Derek Halpern, Steve Kamb, Nick Gray, Vasu Vats, and my (now wife) Cass for reviewing drafts {of the} post, {also to} {all of the} readers who sent along their stories and advice.)
Frequently Asked Questions
The answer {could it be} depends. {Disregard the} rule of {8 weeks} salary. {You need to} spend whatever is right {for you personally} {as well as your} partner. {If you want} help {saving cash}, {have a look at} my guide {on how best to} Save Money
Not at all. {Nobody|No-one} says you {as well as your} partner can’t be perfectly {pleased with} thrift store rings. It’s totally {your decision} and {what you would like}.